Thursday, December 18, 2008


Humans: Eat, sleep, and reproduce. And some specimens, a little more besides. That’s it, really. The most advanced creatures in the world (about from my friends cockatiel, now he is ingenious), striving for the survival of our species.

So, I’ll be blunt: we need to have sex. I’m not flirting with you, I’m stating a fact.

It is not an uncommon practice in the animal kingdom for male and female to mate, then for one or other of the partners to flee. Humans though, we bond. Partners can last a life time without a need of replacement. Such ties can lead to a companionship continually full of passion and admiration, producing offspring – a mix of your genes to produce another life, a bond that will tie you more than a wedding ring, more than that wedding registration.

Sometimes, things go horribly wrong.

Some people… Meet Mr. or Miss. Infidelity.

After being found out, which they always are, and rightly so, eventually, the excuses pour out of vile mouths, always hopeful to be forgiven.

PETTY EXCUSES; “It didn’t mean anything” with a response: “but it was worth jeopardising our relationship”Slightly funnier: “She/he jumped on to my face, and his/my penis just fell into me/her”Personal favourite: “Someone of the opposite sex, it doesn’t count”. Interesting – because it’s not direct competition, but it is still a betrayal.

Then there’s the “it’s not the cheating that hurts, it’s the finding out”.To which the response is somewhat more complicated.One of which I shall come to in a minute.

If you have cheated, you have betrayed your partner. FACT!!!

The only exception if you are in an “open” relationship. In which case, competition of “who is getting more”… I hear can be quite fun if carried through light-heartedly.If not a mutual agreement, one or both partners will feel some degree of inevitable pain.

But cheating? Once is bad, but you can learn from it. Twice, thrice, then you really are pathetic. And your partner is even more pathetic for staying with you if you treat them like this.

That, is of course assuming they know.

If you fail to mention it, here comes the response to “it’s not the cheating that hurts, it’s the finding out”. Not only did you betray them by giving your body (and more, commonly) to someone else, you betrayed their trust by not telling them. You deepen the wound with fingernails you’d spent three years growing, and then poured on the salt you didn’t want on your chips onto the bleeding wound. They, still hopelessly in love with you, live in a fantasy, believing. Believing. Believing what? Believing everything. They are ignorant to the world, by no fault of their own.

Some people want to live in this bubble - these are the people so mentally traumatised, that another setback could lead them to suicide. Frankly, and thankfully, there are few of these in the world comparative to the population.

Here, another excuse:
“I wanted to protect your feelings”
“Why? What sort of excuse is that?”
“Because I love you”
“Shame. Because I hate you” sorry, no, that’s not the response, though begs saying.
The actual words next: “If you loved me, you wouldn’t do that”
“It’s not that simple”
I’m afraid, yes, it is.

Some people think they are in love.Infatuation would be my diagnosis.Or a mentality and a history leading to any emotional attachment to be grasped clutched on to and intensified, to such a degree that its extremity could be mistaken for that of love.

Humans, build to eat, sleep, and have sex. And some specimens, able to build lasting relationships. Their instinct to reproduce, craving intimacy and sex, can lead them to cheat. Some do it purely for the variety.

But one kiss – it can be spontaneous. Sometimes inevitable, that’s the truth.If admitted, the relationship is reparable.

But sex - it takes planning. Plenty of time to say “no”, plenty of time to decide where your priorities lie. Plenty of time to say your own goodbye to a relationship. A relationship is imminently damaged. More so depending on the level of honesty from the betraying party. Forgiveness takes one of two things: A weak, retarded partner in desperate need of qualities this person can give, or a strong will and belief in the love that is shared.

Telling the person you’ve betrayed. Takes courage.

Humans are cowardly – few have this trait.

A contradiction by nature, some would say.